The New Marriage Paradigm

Do you ever wonder how fulfilling your marriage could be?

Do you want to figure out what areas in your relationship need support or improvement?

Do you still feel “fire” for your mate?

Do you feel as if your marriage is doomed to fail?

Your score identifies your level of marriage satisfaction and the most likely outcome you can expect for your marriage. There are five categories to the Marriage Quiz. The highest score you can get is 100 if you have children, and 80 if you do not have children. The lowest score is 20 if you have children, and 5 if you do not have children.

Your score will reveal your level of contentment; how well you communicate; the similarity of the goals, values, and ideals you share; how well you mutually handle issues; and the area that most needs your attention.

How to respond to the Marriage Quiz:

Not True 1 point

Slightly True 2 points

Sometimes True 3 points

Often True 4 points

True 5 points

quiz

Please read each statement and choose one answer that most accurately describes your situation.
Grab a pencil and paper to keep tally of your answers.

Money

1. You and your partner share all information regarding the spending of household money.

2. You and your partner have a good understanding of your assets and debts and share equally in both.

3. You and your partner know what your monthly budget is, and you both strive to live within it.

4. You and your mate completely trust one another with the spending of money.

Not True - 1 point

Slightly True - 2 points

Sometimes True - 3 points

Often True - 4 points

True - 5 points

Children

5. You and your mate agree on the ways your children should be disciplined for mistakes and poor behavior.

6. You and your partner only say and do things that will uphold each other’s decision, even if either of you disagree with the decision.

7. You and your mate are “unified” as parents in the ongoing parenting and decision-making with regard to maintaining what is in the best interest of your kids.

8. Neither you nor your spouse say things that are disrespectful, unkind, and judgmental about each other to your kids.

Not True - 1 point

Slightly True - 2 points

Sometimes True - 3 points

Often True - 4 points

True - 5 points

Communication and Intimacy

9. You and your partner can communicate about sexual desires, fulfillment needs and disappointments.

10. You and your mate can separate the person from the action when communicating feelings.

11. You and your partner communicate with one another about issues, plans, fears, and unmet needs rather than with others who cannot really solve the concern or suspicion you may have.

12. You and your partner have intimacy, spiritually, emotionally and communicatively, and it is expressed naturally, sexually.

Not True - 1 point

Slightly True - 2 points

Sometimes True - 3 points

Often True - 4 points

True - 5 points

Emotional Maturity and Perceptual Wisdom

13. You and your partner share when you are feeling sad, hurt, angry or rejected, and can make wise decisions as a result of the information shared.

14. You and your partner can identify when the wounded part of the self (ego) is speaking and can choose not to react.
You and your mate have learned that any event or conversation can be perceived very differently depending upon past conditioning, and so you remain “open” to each others perspective.

15. You and your mate know each other’s deepest personal dreams and callings and strive to help each other achieve them.

Not True - 1 point

Slightly True - 2 points

Sometimes True - 3 points

Often True - 4 points

True - 5 points

Honesty and Integrity

16. In spite of your concern about how your partner will respond to some of the choices you feel you need to make, you will tell him/her the truth.

17. You and your partner have decided that each of you must treat the other only as each of you wish to be treated.

18. When you have made a mistake, you own up to it and do what is necessary to correct it.

19. Your word is your word; you and your mate are reliable in your commitments and promises.

Not True - 1 point

Slightly True - 2 points

Sometimes True - 3 points

Often True - 4 points

True - 5 points

Please add up your score and scroll down to find your score:

Score: 80 - 100 With Children / 60- 80 Without Children

Congratulations! You have a relationship that is soulful and fulfilling and can withstand the natural soul growth you and your mate will have. It is clear by your score that you hold your marriage as a high priority and that you and your partner are mature in many areas that are critical to relationship fulfillment. Thank you for being an example of the New Marriage Paradigm and demonstrating that your relationship is your path to Enlightenment!

Score: 65 - 79 With Children / 45 - 59 Without Children

You have some strengths and some room for improvement. You may be letting fear and defensiveness override your heart’s wisdom in some situations. The illusion is that “they” are the problem, and it may well be creating roadblocks in your relationship. The truth is that you are the solution, and I can offer you insights, strategies and exercises that will dramatically improve your relationship.

I know that you do have the power to create and respond to the events in your life in a proactive way. I will let you in on one of life’s greatest secrets: people treat us the way we unconsciously treat ourselves. Given this powerful insight, I suggest that you do some journaling and ask some questions about the inner beliefs you are holding that support the idea of being a victim, powerless, or unworthy of greatness.

Score: 50 - 64 With Children / 30 - 44 Without Children

You have wisely taken this quiz, and I believe that the dynamics in your relationship are causing it to be eclipsed by unnecessary stress, blame, conflict, frustration, and potential loneliness. You really could use some help. I want to help you to be all that you were meant to be, and give you the “tools” to create a new and powerful fulfilling union and life.

You can begin redirecting your marriage! You can change the predictable outcome you are heading for, simply by changing your perceptions, identifying your disempowering beliefs, and reclaiming your authentic power.

Score: 65 - 79 With Children / 45 - 59 Without Children

In this scoring range you are probably in a union that feels okay or adequate, but is not completely fulfilling, and definitely not at all what you both deserve to have.

So, this much I can share: If you have not identified your differing values, ideals, and goals, you will be resentful of some of your partner’s wants, needs and pursuits that you have not identified as being in your best interest. The truth is, it is not possible that your partner’s goals and values cannot support you; you just need to connect the “dots.” I can help you do that and offer you so much more in insight and powerful tools that will transform your marriage today!

Authentic power comes from the recognition that you are the master and director of your response to every conversation, thought, and action you encounter from your partner. Through gaining insight and wisdom, you can change not only your behaviors but also those of your mate.

Score: 20 - 34 With Children / 5 - 14 Without Children

Okay, I know exactly how you are probably feeling: defeated, scared, confused, frustrated, lonely, misunderstood, angry, and hurt. Need I continue? I know how you feel because like you I have had an unhappy and unfulfilling marriage; in fact, I have had two! But not anymore.

Given the score you have, I can make some safe assumptions, such as: you do not yet know that you are the single biggest determiner of the success of your union; you do not yet know that you have the power to change your mate without ever asking him/her to change; and you do not yet know the single biggest secret about how we are treated by others in our relationships.

The New Marriage Paradigm will help you immensely. Please pick up your copy today!

My Insights and Communication e-Workbook, an unbelievably awesome resource that will keep your marriage soaring!

The Insights and Communication e-Workbook will help you get started today in creating effective communication which will allow you and your partner’s goals, ideals and values; to be shared and heard. Communication will help you to identify the areas of compatibility, conflict and potential stress areas within your marriage. Use the information that the workbook is designed to extract to create immediate changes in understanding one another, to ignite a new and even deeper understanding, and to create endless opportunities for better communication between you.

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